Projectile Poop

I got pooped on today.
Not just any poop. It was the projectile kind.
I'm talking it seriously FLEW across the room.
In hindsight I should have just stood there and took it. I should have just let it get all over my shirt. But I didn't...
In my defense I think it's some sort of self preservation/defense mechanism to leap to the side if something unpleasant comes flying towards you.
So anyhow, I ducked. Well, more like jumped to the side. If I had ducked it would have been in my hair (gag!).
The poop was EVERYWHERE. Seriously.
Here is a list of everything that got pooped on.
1. My shirt
2. My jeans
3. The changing table pad
4. The changing table wood
5. The carpet
6. Katie, the MIL, clothing
7. Chai
That's right, she pooped on Chai too. The poor dog got pooped on.
We were all standing in the room when it happened. All I can remember is shrieking to Dana that Chai had been pooped on and to clean her off...
It was bad ya'll. Seriously. Bad.